See, the moment I let one person I know write a Broadway Abridged script, everybody's going to want to write one. I've let the fricking floodgates open, I'm sure.

But, I'm willing to put up a guest script for this because
1. I give special priviledges to friends.
2. I have not seen the production in question.
3. I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue than have to watch this production of The Glass Menagerie.
4. I'd rather rip my heart out of my ribcage with my bare hands and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it till I die than see another "thing" directed by David Leveaux.